I am feeling really sick of being me right now. I don't understand what is wring with me. Why do I have to ruin everything? Damn, I wish I could afford a shrink. I am sick of talking out my ass. I am sick of pretending to be so devoted to things that, in reality, I have no time for at all. I am sick of pretending to be the person I want to be while being merely the person I am, day in and day out. I wish I could make plans and follow through. I wish I could get things done. I wish I woudn't spend days in a row dreaming of something, then throwing it away when I finally get the chance to have it. I'm sick of wanting things to get done but being too lazy to work for it. I'm sick of expecting others to do so much, while letting myself do almost nothing.

Today, I had a certain plan in myhead for how the day would go. This is not it. I am home alone, feeling like crap, bitching about my life on my sad little web journal. I should have embracing the time I had. Gods, I am such a hypocrite. So anyway........