Oh my god I can write an entry!! I am really beginning to hate that damn error page. And I swear I'm the only one who is plagued by it, as everyone else seems able to upday whenever they like!! Sorry andrew, don't mean to complain, but it is frustrating...

Okay, I teurned in three more books to my list, so let's do those quickly.

The Fourth Hand by John Irving
I love John Irving every time I read him, this was no exception. Patrick, his missing hand, and his desperate love for a widow who tried to replace it are classic. What else can I say?

Girl With Curious Hair by David Foster Wallace
Okay, I picked up this group of short stories because I remember having Infinite Jest out of the library a few years ago and I didn't finish it in time, but I thought it was supposed to be good. So I decided to try some of his short stuff to get me in the mood...BAD idea!! I have never struggled so hard to get to the end of a book in my life! I wanted to finish it, so I could count it on my list, and I wanted to give an honest and fair try. But it was terrible. Just recently, J.E. was noticing that I read a lot, and asked if I ever read anything I didn't like. At the time, my only real stand-out example, other than whole genres (cheap romance,for example, is NOT literature) was Kerouac's On the Road. And poo poo to you if you liked it, it was just hard to get through and seemingly pointless to me, but no judgment on the beat era itself. But now, a new shining example of hatred is unveiled. David Foster Wallace is so full of himself he needs a starvation diet. Seriously. He tries to make it seem like he is making fun of himself, along with everyone who takes either him or themselves too seriously, but then there is another sickly layer of "I'm too smart for you to figure me out" underneath. His pointless sentences are packed with as many meaningless fifty-cent adjectives as he can whip out of sad little mind at one time. I found myself skimming so many times because I wanted to get to the end of a sentence, and I am not a skimmer. Generally, I love people playing with words and ideas. I love Joseph Heller, Tom Robbins, J.D. Salinger. But this guy I cannot stand. I think he should stop trying to be so avant-garde and try actually writing something.

That said, I also read My Sister's Keeper by Jodi Picoult. It was really good. Not the best writing in the world, but the subject was great. A girl who was genetically desigend to be a perfect donor for her sister with leukemia has decided, at thirteen, that she doesn't want to do it anymore. Great ethics situation, and the characters are real. The ending left me a little cold, but overall it was a good read.

Okay, so, in other news...
I think this is going to be a lomg one, sice I have it all backed up, and some it applies to some people more than others. So much for a spoiler, then.

I got tickets to see Maroon 5!! Yeah, yeah, make fun of me all you want. I think they have a great sound, and I like their whole album, which is rare for me. So I am going to see the in April!! Yay!!!

To Ryuko and Bryan and others....

Yes, I was there in those days. Thank gods, too. Those were some good times. I have a lot to say on the many topics that have been broached since the startof this discussion, but I will limit myself to these five comments.

1. Women are attracted to confidence. But more importantly, Paul, they are attracted to being treated like real people. Once upon a time we were friends that had certain ideas about each other...the truth is, the person who should have been [paying attention to me at the time couldn't be bothered, But you did. We played football together, we made soup, and, most importantly, we talked. You listened. You acted like I mattered. That's what you're good at, and it works, when you do it right.

2. Bryan, do you remember Jennifer and Joe and Karen and all them? They were this big senior-philosophy-major conglomerate, and I was intimidated. I wanted to be them, And when we started hanging out, I thought I finally met someone who would get there with me. Then along came Josh. All other things aside, the three of us got each other to think. That was why we became friends. And other, less studious reasons, of course.

3. Although I often wonder why I am still friends with you, I am. I think I went into it this last time with the belief that I would no longer have to hear things I don't like from you, but they keep coming up. So I am going to briefly address them, nicely, in public, so everyone sees it is just to get it off my chest and not to start anything. Just read to the end before thinking, okay? I hated hearing all those things about Andy all the time. And I have not forgiven you for them so much as moved on. And that's okay, I think, because I don't think you have forgiven me for things I did to hurt you, but you have moved on with me. So be it. I don't like having to read bad things about Cat either. I do still love her, I always have, and I always will. However, I do know there are some truths behind your anger. I knew that a long time ago, but you didn't want to hear it from me. Again, so be it. But here's where it gets interseting. Andy left me. He didn't mean to, but he's gone nonetheless. If he were still here, we probably could not be firends. I have not spoken to Cat since her wedding, over nine months ago. I spoke to you last week. So there you go. Despite all the negativity and hatred and anger...here we are...where are they?

4. Paul, Bryan and I were all good friends for a while. Built a good background. We all fell for the same person, at some point. But here we are. It is so mind-blowing to think of where we came from sometimes. How the hell did we get here?

5. I have done a lot of thinking about things over the past few days. This is my conclusion. Life is screwed up. You can't guess what it will be like in the future because things change quickly, the universe has its own rules. People, especially, are inconstant. I am no exception. So I have been through a bunch of crap, but the truth is, I have been through it with a pretty incredible bunch of people. So rather than focus on all the people and things and whatever that have hurt me, I am going to focus on the fact that I have met enough people who are so good as to convince me to open myself up to them enough to allow myself to be hurt by them in the first place. So there you go. As for the people I have hurt on my way...I have to hope they will forgive and forget as well.