So...a while a go I did a thing where I was writing like how I felt about all my friends. I always forget to go back and do that. And I haven't looked at it in a while so I don't know who I forgot and all the stuff. Anyway, I wanted to write this entry just about Ben.

I'm not sure if Ben ever reads this. I know he knows the address, anybody I know probably knows what it is from, and he certainly does. And we never came out and talked about it, or about whether or not I wanted him to read it. If he does, he may know that I would feel weird if i knew for sure that he did read it. So it's all strange. But in case he does read, and even if he doesn't, I want to say a few things about him.

He has never let me down. Okay, he may forget to do the dishes every now and then. But when it comes down to it, when it really matters, he has always come through. He always says it will be okay, and it always is. And I know he'll keep telling me that, no matter how often I freak out.

He always makes me laugh. Sometimes when I REALLY don't want to, but he knows how to calm me down. We can have just as much fun cleaning the house together as we do at a party or going to dinner or something.

He keeps me warm.

He knows my moods. He understands how I work.

And when he doesn't, he won't push. He waits until I'm ready to come out of that particular shell.

He's so smart. He can discuss philosophy with me, even at a disadvantage. And he wants to discuss these things, in itslef amazing.

I won't go into the physical, so as to not gross anybody out. But Ben, if you are reading, you know how I feel.

And that's entirely the point.